Greetings Felines and the humans who serve us!
I’d like to specifically address the humans this week. I know that you admire us yoga cats and rightly so yet you often make it hard for us to practice.
Do you want to learn from us and maybe just maybe reach a small bit of enlightenment in your lifetime? If so (or even if you don’t because you know you’re a lost cause) please take special note of the list below. Take every precaution to make sure that we yoga cats’ yoga time is free from these distractions. Thank you in advance!
- STROKING AND PETTING: Please don’t start in with a bunch of petting when we are meditating or practicing a particularly challenging asana. We prefer to come to you when we want pets and not the other way around.
- TALKING IN A HIGH PITCHED TONE: We know that we are adorable creatures and do like to hear you say so but please speak to us as the supreme beings we are and not like we are toddlers.
- EXCESSIVE PHOTO TAKING: Taking pictures of us constantly while we are trying to practice yoga is very annoying. Honestly what did you humans do before digital photography?
- NOT ENOUGH YOGA MATS TO GO AROUND: For multiple cat households, please provide enough mats for each of us to practice on even if it means letting us use yours. And if you decide to practice at the same time as us and we want your mat as well, then please step aside or learn to work around us.
- THE VACUUM CLEANER: The noise that comes blaring from this horrible machine makes us run the risk of getting our perfectly aligned chakras out of whack!
- NOT PROVIDING ENOUGH CATNIP: Please make sure you always have plenty of catnip in the house especially during yoga time. Please keep on good terms with your catnip connection or better yet grow it in the house so you never run out.
These suggestions are just the tip of the iceberg. Felines, please chime in with your suggestions as well and have your humans post them in the comments section. We yoga cats must stand up for ourselves and make sure that our humans do not cause us to devolve!
Until next time…
Meow and Namste!